• Kink-Competent, LGBTQ+ Affirming, & GSRD-Inclusive Psychologist & Sex Therapist in California

    Welcome! I’m glad you’re here. My name is Dr. Eric van der Voort and I understand how important it is that your psychologist appreciates your sexual health needs and interests. I specialize in delivering high-quality Individual Psychotherapy and Individual Sex Therapy services via Video Telehealth to adults throughout California.

    I work best with motivated individuals who want to feel more grounded, more attuned to their wants and needs, more confident in expressing themselves, more connected to their partners, and better able to enjoy sex. Combining evidence-based research with years of experience in this fascinating field, my professional style is often described as being down-to-earth, nonjudgmental, supportive, direct, and playfully engaging. Together, we will uncover the barriers that keep you from getting more of what you want, both in and out of the bedroom.

    Whether you’re ready to feel more confident, communicate more effectively, explore your kinky fantasies, or discover new ways of experiencing pleasure (or all of the above), I invite you to schedule your free Introductory Phone Call. I look forward to helping you enjoy better sex and overall wellness.

    Sex Therapy - Is It Right For You?

    Here Are Some Questions To Ask Yourself:

    • Have I previously felt judged or embarrassed when talking to health professionals about my sex life?
    • Have my health providers understood how important my sex life and sexual identity are?
    • Do my providers understand and support my participation in kink, BDSM, or alternative relationship structures?
    • Am I finding it difficult to navigate the complexities of polyamorous, open, non-monogamous, or “monogamish” relationships?
    • Is it challenging for me to explore and verbalize my sexual needs and preferences?
    • Am I worried my partner(s) won’t accept or understand a certain part of me, my sexuality, eroticism, or sexual identity?

    Common Concerns Addressed in Sex Therapy

    BDSM, Kinks, & Fantasies

    • You have sexual fantasies you’d like to explore but you’re unsure where or how to start.
    • You feel guilty or ashamed about your interests or attractions to certain types of people, porn, kinks, or fantasies.
    • You’re interested in learning more about kinks/BDSM, consent, power exchange, and how to play safely.

    Performance Anxiety & Desire Discrepancies

    • You sometimes feel like there’s something wrong with you when it comes to sex.
    • You’re less interested in sex than you’d like or than you used to be.
    • You find it difficult to get and maintain an erection during sex, or to feel aroused enough to be interested in sex.

    Substance Use With Sex

    • Most or all of the sex you have or enjoy happens while you’re under the influence of a substance.
    • Thinking about having sex without drugs or alcohol gives you anxiety.
    • Your alcohol or substance use is preventing you from connecting with others or from creating the intimacy you’d like to have.

    Sexuality & Sexual Identity

    • You’d like to explore your sexuality and to feel more sexually confident.
    • The sex you’re having is not the sex you’d ideally want.
    • You want to have better sex more often.
    • You’ve tried “spicing things up” in the bedroom, only to fall back into old patterns shortly afterward.
    • You feel frustrated or hopeless with the quality of sex you have.
    • Since COVID, it’s been harder for you to feel comfortable having sex with new people.
    • You’ve previously felt judged or embarrassed when talking to health professionals about your sex life.

    Pornography & Masturbation

    • Your porn use is interfering with your self-esteem, relationships, or other obligations, including work.
    • You’ve been told hat you have a porn or sex “addiction” and feel guilty or ashamed about it.
    • It is sometimes easier for you to masturbate to porn than it is to find pleasure in having sex with others.
    • You feel disconnected from your values when you use porn, online dating & hookup apps, strip clubs, sex workers, or massages with “happy endings.”
    • You have difficulty becoming aroused, erect, or having an orgasm if you’re not looking at porn.

    Relationships & Effective Communication

    • You want to better communicate with your partner(s) about sex.
    • It’s hard for you to tell your partner(s) your sexual wants and needs.
    • You allow your sexual and romantic desires to go unspoken and unmet.
    • You often put the needs of others above your own, leaving you to feel unfulfilled and resentful.
    • You feel like you’re missing the emotional and sexual intimacy you wish you had with your partners.
    • You’re thinking about opening up your relationship, whether for love, sex, or both.

    Ready to Enjoy Better Sex?